


Two Out Of Three (Three Dates, Five Duels)

by DeepBlueRhombus



Series: Anxiety, Friendship, and Cake [3]
Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Dating, Double Dating, F/M, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Misogyny, Pre-Timeskip | Academy Phase (Fire Emblem: Three Houses), Tournaments
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-19
Updated: 2021-02-19
Packaged: 2021-03-15 22:35:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,208
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29566203
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DeepBlueRhombus/pseuds/DeepBlueRhombus
Summary: Following his disastrous attempt to get Dimitri to date more, Sylvain tries to set up a triple date so that he can personally help Dimitri strike it up with someone.  He's kind of shitty about it, but it mostly works out OK.
Relationships: Ashe Duran | Ashe Ubert & Leonie Pinelli, Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd & Edelgard von Hresvelg, Sylvain Jose Gautier/Petra Macneary
Series: Anxiety, Friendship, and Cake [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1877353
Kudos: 9





	Two Out Of Three (Three Dates, Five Duels)

## Two Out Of Three

###  Three Dates, Five Duels: Part One

**_1 Blue Sea Moon, 1180  
Announcing The First-Ever Garreg Mach Interdisciplinary Tournament!  
Represent Your House In Sword, Axe, Lance, Bow, Brawling, Or Magic!  
Sign Up Today!  
_ **

#### That Went Well

I’ve got the perfect angle, I thought as I knocked on the door. I could have asked Dorothea first, but that would too easy. No commoners for the boss man, only the best- an heir, even! Besides, picking off low hanging fruit is my job.

After a moment, Lysithea came to the door. Her hands were clasped at her waist demurely- you can’t beat noblewomen for manners and grace- but the door swung open without hesitation and she stood squared of facing me directly. Assertive. Dimitri would like that.

“Yes, Sylvain?” Her look wasn’t quite a glare. “I’m busy studying.”

“Heyo, Ly!” I gave her the patented Sylvain smil-irk. Not quite a smile, not quite a smirk. Few can pull off confident and self deprecating in one fell swoop, but that’s why I’m the master. “How’s it going this lovely evening?”

She raised an eyebrow, and there was a pause. Maybe even an awkward pause.

“Did you come here for a reason, Sylvain?”

“Indeed I did!” I reached out an arm towards hers and tried to walk us into the room for a chat, but when her eyes locked onto my incoming hand with a hawk-like focus I adapted it into a friendly wave. The ability to read a room is one of my many charms. The fact that all of my limbs are non-disintegrated is another. Better safe than sorry.

Straight to it, then: “You’re a lovely young woman and I-“

“I’m not going on a date with you, Sylvain.”

Ah, they all think they know me, but Sylvain has layers!

“Of course not, my dear! I wouldn’t dream of it!” She’s short, so this is so easy. “I’ve got _bigger_ fish to fry anyway”. Point, Sylvain. I’m hotter when I’m unavailable anyway.

“Great. You’ll be going then.” She moved to close the door, but I already had my foot in the way. I pretended not to notice as it bounced off.

“As I was saying, you’re a lovely young woman and-“

“-and you’re paid by the redundancy.”

“-and I’m trying to arrange a little inter-house diplomacy. You know, to ensure the continued peace of Fódlan! I’ve got two dashing, up-and-coming men of the Blue Lions who are going to join me in a week for a delightful dinner- my treat. I’ve already got a date, of course, but I’m looking for two more women for a social mixer to promote some diplomacy between the Kingdoms. For Fódlan.”

The eyebrow went up again. There was that pause, again.

“And who should I think of but you! So smart, and the heir to the noble house of Ordelia. You should absolutely be present at our soirée.”

Her voice went high pitched in a sarcastic mockery of feminine speech. “Why thank you, Sylvain, but no thank you. Fódlan will have to do without me.” She paused for a beat to see if I would leave, then continued, “You can go now.”

Ah, but I knew that was coming! Sylvain sees things.

“Of course.” I bowed sarcastically. “you are a bit young for that sort of thing anyway.” Gotcha!

Her eyebrows narrowed and she stared directly into my eyes. She’s way too fond of these awkward pauses.

“I’m on to you.”

Somehow, despite my foot, the door closed.

#### Classy

I couldn’t ask women from our house. Personally, I think he should date all three. Mercedes is smoking hot under that conservative dress, you know Annette would be fun in bed, and Ingrid would be, like, his soul mate. Not Dimitri, though. He’s got all these “morals” and “qualms” and “obligations as the leader of the house.” So, no Blue Lions.

I could hit up some women in town. You know the chicks in the tavern would be crazy for a prince and all if that money he’s going to inherit. Better than a crest! I’m going to do him one better, though. Nothing but royalty. Sylvain’s going to run a _classy_ dating service.

#### First Time’s The Charm

Lysithea didn’t really count anyway. I just figured I’d throw it out there. You don’t land any fish if you don’t cast a line! So, I asked Hilda next and it went smooth as silk.

Hilda was the ideal candidate. I knew her better than most of the women of the other houses; I’d made a pass at her and somehow ended up getting tricked into doing chores for her before we amiably agreed to both cut it out. She’s not first in line for anything, but she is a noble!

I caught sight of her reading some poster hanging outside the training grounds, and fell in step beside her as she went down the stairs towards the rest of the monastery grounds. After spending a truly unfair amount of time convincing her this wasn’t some scheme to get her to hook up with me again, she agreed that a night out could be fun.

As she walked away, I discovered a list of chores in my hand and dimly remembered to agreeing to do them so that she would be free that evening.

#### Strategerizing

Professional assistance was clearly needed. Dimitri’s a trainwreck! His last attempt to loosen up and play the field ended with him hiding in my room and throwing me to the disappointingly plain looking wolves. Clearly, Dimitri can’t be trusted with women on his own.

A double date would be no good, however. If I’m with him, Dimitri look like a loser in comparison. Muscles and a princedom are good, but it’s hard to compete with Sylvain when you’re about as personable as a loaf of stale bread. So, I asked Ashe to join us. Or, at least, I told him about the plan and thanked him for joining us, then made a swift exit before he could object. Goddess bless the unassertive!

Any fool can arrange double date anyway, but only a master can pull off the triple date.

#### Switching Targets

I tried to decide who would be next. The Blue Lions were off the table. Bernadetta? I’d have to drag her to the table. Literally. Edelgard is… a little intimidating, honestly. Dorothea? You know the gold digger would be down for that. Pairing her with Ashe would be funny, but she’d eat the little man alive. Also, not a noble.

No, you know who? Marianne. I can just tell her she’s coming, like Ashe. She’s also adopted, like him, so it makes sense! They’ve got stuff to talk about! I lingered on a bench outside the Officer’s Academy and followed her to the dining hall for lunch. When she sat down, I sidled down in the seat next to her.

“Oh, hey! Marianne, right?”

She looked down at her food. “Hello.” After an uncertain pause, “Sylvain.”

The redhead from Golden Deer- Leonie?- sat across the table from us. “Hey, Marianne! Is he bothering you?”

Marianne looked up at Leonie, then at me, flustered. “No. He can sit there. I just…”

“C’mon Sylvain.” Leonie made a shooing gesture at me. “Find someone else to sniff after.” Rude!

I clutched my chest theatrically. Always make it a laugh. “Why, Leonie, I wasn’t-“

Marianne spoke up. “No, he didn’t… he just sat down here.”

Leonie laughed. “So, he didn’t have time to yet.”

Well, that wasn’t going to work. I made a quick change of plans.

“Well, you’ve got my number, Leonie.” I made a mock bow at Marianne. “You’re safe from my predations, my dear.” Marianne looked back at her food and mumbled something. “But while I’m here…”

Leonie rolled her eyes at me, but I soldiered on. “… I’m actually looking for you.”

“Really?”

“Yes, really.” I put a hand to my chest, “I’m wounded you think I’d be bothering such a delicate beauty as this lovely woman here.” Marianne tried to shrink into the bench. “Can’t a man enjoy his lunch in peace?”

“A lot of us would like to. So, what do you want from,” she said with sarcastic emphasis, “ _me?_ ”

“I’m here on behalf of Ashe.”

“The skinny boy with the bow?”

“That’s the one!”

“Why?”

“Well, you know. The poor kid likes you but he’s too shy to ask you out. And he’s a fellow Lion so I thought I could help out.”

“Really.”

“Really! I told him it was no problem. As you allude, _I’m_ not plagued with being inconveniently shy. I’m already buying dinner for a special lady later this week, so I told him I’d ask you for him. You could join us! I figure if you’re not alone, it will be less awkward.”

“That’s very charitable of you.”

I struck a comedically puffed-up pose. “I’m a charitable kind of guy.”

“Ok. I’m in.”

Really? … “Really?”

“Yeah, really. He’s kind of cute and it’s a free meal. You can’t beat that value.”

“How very economical. You know, Ashe comes from commoner roots, just like you? You have so much-“

“-in common, yes. You don’t need to sell me more, Sylvain. When is this date?”

#### Three for Three

I couldn’t just chaperone. That’d ruin my reputation! I needed one more girl, for me. I thought about it and who was left? Petra! She’s technically a noble- a princess, even! I’ve never been with someone from Brigid, either, so that’s cool.

I caught her in the dining hall with my best smile. “Hey, Petra!”

She looked me up and down. Admire the goods, lady. I work hard to keep the view pleasant.

“Hello. You are being Sylvain?” Ah, right. She’s the one that talks like that.

“I _am_ Sylvain Jose Gautier, yes.”

“It is good to see you. Why are you speaking to me?”

I threw an arm around her shoulder. She looked at it briefly, then threw the arm around my shoulder so we were standing arm-and-arm together in the middle dining hall. Awkward. I started walking us away to a less crowded area.

”So, Petra. I am arranging an evening of dining.” I pondered if I should I talk slower. Use smaller words? No. I decided to show her I respected her intelligence. “A chance for the fine heirs and heiresses of Fódlan to meet and mingle.”

“You are arranging this?” That wasn’t a no. A good start!

“Yes, I am arranging this!” I pushed the double doors open and we took a right and walked among the hedges between the buildings. “A romantic, yet formal evening of dining for the heirs and heiresses of Fódlan to gather and mingle. My treat, of course. So that the future leaders of this great continent may get to know each other and foster another decade of peace through strong diplomatic ties and alliances.”

I continued. “And I would be negligent to exclude a vital ally such as Brigid from such an event,” I finished, “Would you join us?”

She cocked her head. It was pretty cute.

“Another decade? Dagda, Brigid, and Adrestia were warring only five years ago.”

Details, details. “Well, besides that!”

“And Hyrm and Ordelia were insurrecting nine years ago.”

Ugh. Off topic! I raised my hand nobly towards the sky. “And we can do better! Where our parents could not maintain the peace for even a measly decade-“

“Six years.”

“-or six years, their children will keep the peace for a century to come.” I smiled and looked her straight in the eyes. Chicks dig that. “Together.”

She stopped to think. I took the opportunity to free my arm.

“It is a good plan. Romantic, so this is being a date?”

“A formal and very proper date, yes.”

“And who are being the heirs at this date?”

“Well, Dimitri, Ashe, and myself. But Dimitri and Ashe already have dates so you would be eating with me.” I dared a roguish wink. “I saved the best for last, after all.” Nailed it!

She looked me up and down. Admire the goods, lady.

“You will be doing. At what time and place is this event?”

Three for three! I’m _good_ at what I do.

#### Awkward

Ashe came up to me in the dining hall the next day.

“Hey, Sylvain.” He put his tray next to me and sat down.

“Hey, Ashe! Looking forward to your big date?” He didn’t _technically_ said yes, but...

“Well, uh. A date at least. I mean, I don’t even know who-“

“I got you Leonie, my guy! Cute little redhead?”

“And I’ve been on- Uh. Well, that’s fine, but-“

“And you have so much in common! You didn’t have it easy like the rest of us noble folks. But here you are!”

“Oh, I guess we do. I-“

“Unless you like them curvier?” He was blushing. Aww. The little guy is adorable. I know he’ll say no, so I push it. “We could trade. I got Petra, but I don’t mind slumming it. She’s a princess and-“

“No, that’s fine. I think Leonie is fine. I just-“

“Great! So are you ready for your big date?”

“I mean, I haven’t even talked to her, but…” He looked up at me. So earnest! “I just wanted to say… thanks.”

“No problem! You’re my house, so I have to look after you!” I waved a hand up and down over myself. “All these gifts have to be good for something, after all.”

“I mean, Dimitri’s a prince and you’re the second son of house Gautier and I just wanted to thank you for… I mean, I know that I was adopted by Lo-“

He cut off and looked down. Damn. That jerk professor in the Golden Deer brought him along to put down an insurrection and he had to kill his own father. Lonato was a rebel, but he was still the kid’s dad. Why the hell did the weirdo bring Ashe along for that?

I wasn’t really sure what to say, but after a moment Ashe looked up at me again, painfully earnest.

“Well, I know I was adopted by Lonato but… I know I’m not really one of you.”

… What do you say to that? I tried. “No, Ashe. You’re… I mean…”

He smiled at me, sadly. “I just wanted to say, thank you for including me. I appreciate it.”

Poor kid. That new professor is a jerk.

#### Go Team!

It was the day before the triple date when Hilda torpedoed my plans.

“Hey, Syl! How’s it going?” She cheerfully bounced slightly. The unreadable wall of perk was full strength.

“Hey, Hilda! Looking forward to our big night, tomorrow?”

“Yeah, about that. I can’t go. I made it to the finals of the tournament!”

“The tournament?”

“Yeah! Haven’t you seen the signs everywhere?”

“I, uh, must have missed them.”

She projected cheer at me again. “Aww, you just didn’t want to mess up that pretty hair of yours competing. Anyway, the finals are happening the night of your outing and it probably won’t wrap up until your dinner is almost over anyway.”

Darn it. “Maybe you could show up late?” I could switch her and Leonie. Ashe won’t mind going solo for most of the night. Maybe I can sweet talk Leonie to swapping with Petra, too, so I’m not sticking Dimitri with a commoner?

“Aww, I think it would be un-ladylike to stand up my date.” She pouted slightly. Grrr. In the words of Lysithea, I’m on to you, lady.

“We must know different ladies. Isn’t hitting people with an axe kind of un-ladylike? Also, isn’t it a bit like, you know, work? I seem to remember work is very un-Hilda-like.”

She dimpled. “I seem to recall promising you I’d work harder and stop trying to get other people to do my work for me.”

Hey! “I think that was just _me_ you’d stop getting to do work for you.”

“Well, I also promised the professor I’d try to work harder and a lady has to keep her promises.” She grinned at me. “Also, don’t tell Edelgard that hitting people with an axe is un-ladylike. She might not like it- especially because I just knocked her on her butt!”

“Wha-“

“Good luck finding a replacement for your outing!”, she trilled, and quickly turned and skipped off.

“Wai-“ She was gone. Ugh. Why me?

#### Two For Four, Three For Five

Dorothea, then. Ashe’ll be fine with that. Dorothea wasn’t in the dining hall, but I knocked on the door of the Black Eagle’s officer academy room and Petra answered.

“Oh, hello, Sylvain! It is good to see you! What are you wanting?”

“Hey, Petra! Looking forward to our big night?” She can’t also be quitting on me, right?

“I am very much looking forward to our big night.”

“Great! Is Dorothea around?”

“She is. Shall I ask her to be coming to the door?”

“Yes, please.”

Petra pulled Dorothea over to the door.

“Hey, Dorothea!”

“Oh, hello Sylvain.” She smiled politely at me and cocked her head. “What brings you to our house’s door?”

“Just the social opportunity of a lifetime!” I overdid it a bit on purpose to show I was in on the joke. “I’m arranging a dinner social with the most eligible bachelors of the Blue Lions and the women of the other houses. A chance for the up and coming to meet, network,” I raised an eyebrow and swayed slightly, “and maybe find love. And what Garreg Mach social event would be complete without the star of the Mittelfrank Opera?”

She nodded at me. “That sounds great, Sylvain, thank you for the invitation!” I perked up. Success! Then she clasped her hands together and politely finished, “I’m afraid I’ve got a girl’s night out with Manuela that evening.”

Fine. Dimitri then. “But you didn’t let me finish! Dimitri will be there, and he’s confided in me that he finds you particularly charming.”

“That’s very sweet of him, Sylvain. I still have plans for the evening, however.”

Inertia kept me going forward. “Did you know he’s a prince? Of the whole kingdom of Faerghus! Opportunities like this don’t arise very often. You can’t say no to meeting with a prince, can you?”

She nodded at me again, polite smile still in place. “I think I just did, Sylvain.” Owch! “I can introduce myself to him some other evening. Thank you for the invitation.” She walked away from the door.

Petra had been listening in. “We are missing a woman for the dinner tomorrow?”

Never let them see you falter. I fixed a confident smile on her. “Looks like it. Don’t worry. I know lots of women. But… uh… is there anyone else in your house that might be available? There’s, uh, Bernadetta, right?”

“I do not think this is an activity she would be interested in.”

“I guess not. Um…”

“Then there is just being Edelgard.” She looked over her shoulder.

Well, she is just about as royalty as you can get, but that seemed like a bad idea. There’s no way she would say yes, would she?

“She is having nothing to do after being eliminated from the tournament. None of our house is making it to the final round, so there is not even housemates to be cheering.”

Well, I guess you don’t catch a fish if you don’t cast a line. “Sure, Petra. Maybe you could ask her for me?”

“I will be right back!” She left the door ajar and went back into the academy room. Curiously, I peeked through the crack and saw the heir do the Adrestian Empire leaning in a chair looking slightly disgruntled. When Petra asked her, I saw her visibly snort and could hear her say _”him?”_ She turned to look at me in the doorway, and I quickly pulled my head back.

A few minutes later, Petra returned to the door.

“She will be going!”

“Really? I mean, great!” Score one for the S-man!

“I think she is liking you, because she says she will be keeping an eye on you. Maybe you should be dating her?”

“I was thinking she’d be better off with Dimitri. Besides, I make it a rule to never date women that could snap me in half.”

“That is a joke?”

“Sort of.”

“She also is saying that she may as well go as a favor to me because if she has humiliated herself once tonight so why is it not bad to be humiliated twice? That is also a joke?”

Well, a yes is a yes. I’ll take it.

“Yes, Petra. Edelgard is a very funny woman.”

“Fódlan humor is hard to understand. I have not been thinking that she is known for joking.”

Guess she doesn’t misunderstand Fódlan humor that badly. I excused myself before she could ask any follow-up questions.

#### Date Night

It had arrived! Ashe, Dimitri and I arrived together, early, and ordered food for the table. As we settled down, Dimitri turned to me.

“Well, the day has arrived. Hopefully it will go better than my solo adventures.”

Ashe glanced at me in askance and I made shushing gestures. No need to embarrass the boss man.

“I’ve been so busy coaching the house members for the tournament,” Dimitri continued, “- not to mention dragging Dedue to it kicking and screaming- that I never got around to asking you. Who is my date to be tonight?”

With impeccable timing, Petra and Edelgard arrived. I greeted them with a bow, gesturing for them to come join us. “Ah, here they are now!” Dimitri looked apprehensive. “I figured since looking for fun among the commoners wasn’t going so well for you, so maybe you’d click better with someone who understands the burden of rule.” I nudged him in the ribs. “Plus, if you do hit it off, at least you’re meeting a partner appropriate to your duties as a prince. I know you take that stuff seriously.”

As the girls came over, I made the introductions. Still looking apprehensive, Dimitri gestured towards Petra. “So, uh… Then my date for the evening is…”

I gave Petra my most dazzling smile and moved to put an arm around her waist. “Oh no, my prince. You don’t think I’d let you have the most lovely woman in the room did you?” Charm! Edelgard looked at me and raised an eyebrow. Ooops. “I mean, you’re the prince so of course you get the most important, powerful woman here.” I waved an arm towards Edelgard.

Dimitri stood there like a statue, looking a bit pale.

Edelgard, at least, had her act together. “My prince.” She reached out a hand and took his. “I’m sure we’ll have a lovely evening together.”

“I- uh, yes. Of course.” Dimitri de-statue-ed and put on a formal face. He managed a little bow. “I’m delighted to have your company for the night, princess Edelgard.”

He twitched slightly. Sylvain to the rescue! I chimed in, “Perfect! I’m sure you two have so much in common. Can I get you ladies glasses of wine?”

Edelgard and Petra nodded. I asked the waiter for a glass and tried to break the ice. “You’ll have to be gentle with my prince, princess Edelgard. I know it’s hard to believe of such a dashing, chivalrous figure but,” I leaned in conspiratorially, “he’s really not much of a lady’s man. Oh, the stories I could tell you.”

Edelgard panned a calculating smile from me to Dimitri. “Oh, you must tell.” Dimitri stared daggers at me.

I continued. “But, you know, I figured it’s a natural fit. You’re a princess, he’s a prince. Who knows?” I flashed a dopey grin. “Maybe if it goes well the Kingdom and the Empire could get back together.”

Dead silence. After a beat, Edelgard said, “Well, I think that sounds just lovely.” Another beat, then, “Don’t you think so, my prince?”

Dimitri managed a cool smile and nod from behind the wall of stone-faced brooding that had gone up. Geez. “None know what the future may hold, my princess.”

Petra looked from face to face with open curiosity, and it was then that Leonie finally arrived. “Hey!” she said, then looked around the silent room in confusion. “Uh, good to see you guys. Has Sylvain made it weird already?”

“Y-“ Petra started, but Edelgard stepped forward with a warm smile and interrupted. “Greetings. You’re Leonie, right? I guess you must be our third.” Leonie came over and shook Edelgard’s proffered hand. “Sylvain is displaying his _best_ behavior and taste, I am sure.” Hey! “We’re just getting acquainted with our company for the evening.”

#### Dinner and Conversation

We chatted through the appetizers, then the staff brought out roasted pheasant and parsnips for the entrees and left us for the evening; I’d rented the place for after hours with promises to close up afterwards, so that the six of us could dine in peace.

Leonie and Ashe hit it off, and Petra listened inquisitively to everything everyone was saying. To my surprise, even Dimitri loosened up and started participating in the conversation.

Meanwhile, Edelgard’s grace eventually wore away to a bored impatience. I tried to liven things up for her with a joke at Dimitri’s expense. “-and then,” I finished, “he gave the girl a dagger as a gift!”

To my surprise, Dimitri didn’t even blush. Instead, he smiled conspiratorially at Edelgard. “Yes. I think the princess may be familiar with that story already.”

Edelgard looked slightly confused. Leonie piped in. “Well, I think a dagger is an excellent gift for a date!” Petra nodded, knowingly. How unromantic!

Edelgard looked thoughtful, then looked up at Dimitri. “I…” she trailed off, then resumed. “I suppose I may.” What, he told her that story already? And when did Dimitri learn to be self-deprecating? That's my job!

Dimitri looked sheepish and held up a hand. “It was a long time ago, my lady. I apol-“

Edelgard interrupted. “No.” She smiled at him. “Leonie is right. A dagger is an excellent gift.”

Dimitri smiled back, tentatively. Is that chemistry? Nailed it!

I’m not about to let him steal my thunder, though. I interjected. “There was this one time Dimitri promised me he’d take time off for himself and try dating and…”

Dimitri kicked me under the table. Hard. “Sylvain. You promised you’d keep this story a secret.”

Edelgard leaned forward and took a bite from a pheasant leg, looking a bit predatorial. “Oh, now I must hear about _this_.”

Dimitri shook his head and glared death at me. “Sylvain. I am your lord. I command you to keep your promise.”

“Well…” I shrugged. Edelgard sighed.

I took a sip as Dimitri relaxed. As I put my mug down, he grabbed his and when he started drinking, I quickly leaned over towards Edelgard.

“Hescreweditupandhadtohidefromhisdateinmybedroo- OWCH!” That man can kick!

“SYLVAIN!” Dimitri roared. Uh-oh.

“I, uh,” I rolled out of my chair so fast I fell to one knee and had to bounce back up to standing. Gracefully, of course. “If the ladies will excuse me, I must use the facilities.”

Leonie’s laugher chased me as I made a hasty exit from the room.

When I returned, Leonie and Ashe were geeking out about some sort of bow maintenance trick. Petra seemed to be mentally taking notes, while methodically cleaning every bit of meat from the bones of her bird. Whatever was going on with Edelgard and Dimitri must have stalled because he was sitting there quietly, saying nothing, and she was sipping the last of her drink and nodding politely to Ashe’s suggestions.

I’m sad to say, Edelgard and Dimitri never really got going again. Edelgard excused herself first, and Dimitri not long after.

I tried to stop Dimitri from leaving. “Don’t you want to stay for the dessert, boss man?”

Dimitri shook his head. “No thank you. It won’t taste like anything to me anyway. I should check on our own housemate’s tournament results and then go to bed.”

“Okay.” It was kind of depressing. I looked at the table, and after a moment, said, “Did I mess up? I’m sorry that this didn’t seem like a lot of fun for you.”

Dimitri gave me the ghost of a smile. “Thank you for trying, Sylvain. I’m not sure that romance is what I need right now.”

He’s a good guy. “Have a good night, Highness.” He nodded and wandered off.

I turned to Ashe and Leonie. “So, are you guys ready for dessert?”

“Actually…” Ashe hesitated. “Leonie and I were thinking of going back to the equipment room and trying to fix some of her old bows.”

I’m sorry to say, I don’t even think they were being euphemistic about that.

Leonie grinned at me. “I’m stuffed anyway. It was a really great meal though. Thanks!” She looked over at Ashe. “I can’t complain about your choice of company, either.”

Well, I’ll take it. Leonie bagged up some leftovers for later, and the two of them went off.

#### Just Us

Then it was just the two of us. Convenient for intimacy, but a lot more work conversationally. I brought out a bottle of wine and the peach sorbet the help had left in an icebox. The other four were missing out!

As we settled in on the final course, I figured I better make some small talk. “So, um, how are things in Brigid?”

“I am not knowing recently. Five years ago, I came here as, um… polite hostage?... after we lost the war. Is that the words?”

Ooops. She lost her dad in the war too, didn’t she?

I chuckled to cover the awkwardness. “There’s probably a nicer way to say it, but I like the phrase.” I scooped up a spoonful of sorbet to buy a moment. “Uh. Well, then, do you like it here?”

“It is very interesting. I am learning many new things which will be useful things when I return home.” She smiled and tilted her head with a touch of self-deprecation. “Also I am learning to speak your language and will not always sound like this. That will be useful too.”

“I think it’s really great that you’re learning a second language. Most of us don’t bother. I tried as a kid but I wasn’t smart enough.”

“I am thinking that it is less about smart, and more about motivation.” She shrugged, and waved a hand around the dining hall. “But I am also having advantages. Being… surrounded… by people with the other language helps.” She snorted and flicked a hand up into the air. “I was almost saying ‘trapped’, which is a little true but too… sad? It is not so sad. Is there a better word?”

“Hmm. Sad works. You could say you were almost ‘brooding’. That’s a good word.”

“Brooding. It is a good word.”

“Especially if you’re Dimitri.”

She snorted again. It was pretty cute. “Dimitri is brooding?”

“Very much so, especially when he thinks nobody is looking.”

“Hmm.” She paused. “So how are you liking it here?”

“It’s fine. I’m surprised we spend so much time studying how to fight and so little time studying how to rule.”

Petra nodded. “The nobility of Fódlan do be studying fighting often. Perhaps that is why Brigid lost.”

“Um.”

She gestured at me and smiled again. “No, I am not brooding. I am sorry- please continue.”

“It’s interesting being around all these people from different places.”

Petra nodded. “It is.”

“The Lions are interesting, too. I mean, I knew some of them, but not all of them.” I stopped and thought. “It’s also different when you’re living with them every day instead of just seeing a few people during visits to their court.”

Petra nodded again. “How are you liking the people of your house?”

“They’re kind of… intense, I guess. The boys are all, well, brooding in one way or another. The girls all seem caught up with their own little obsessions.”

“My house too. Less brooding, more angry, I think. Tense.”

“Huh.”

Things got silent again and we picked at our desserts with our forks. Well. The conversation isn’t really popping here, but I’m out of things to say. May as well make a move- at worst she’ll say no and I can get some extra sleep in.

“Hey, Petra, I’ve got some really good tea back in my room. Would you like to join me for a cup?”

“For the tea or for the sex?”

Whoa, I thought. Well, that makes it easy. “Uh, heh, heh… Both, if you’d like?”

“Ok, we can be going.”

“Just like that? Uh, great!” Will I look too eager if I just hop up out of my chair? I froze for a minute and almost blushed. Get it together! “That’s, uh, great. Most girls in Fódlan like to at least pretend that it’s just for the tea. Are people in Brigid more forward about that?”

She looked a little bit exasperated. “Sylvain, you are not thinking. I am being princess. We are a hereditary monarchy. We are caring very much about who is sleeping with who. But nobody is in this room but you and me right now. Also, you were the one who invited, not me.”

“Oh, uh, sorry.” Don’t blow it!

Wait. “Also… you throw a sentence like ‘I am being princess’ at me, then toss out a phrase like ‘hereditary monarch’?”

That got a smile. “Government studies class. I am being _A_ princess, remember?”

“Oh, right.” I didn’t bother to correct the grammar further.

“And perhaps I am selling it too much. I think your people may care more about… children of people who are not wedded?”

“Bastards?”

“Yes. Bastards. Also I have heard none of the women of my class discuss the herbs which make you not pregnant. Do you not like to talk about these things as much?”

“Don’t look at me. I’m a guy.”

“Well, perhaps these are reasons why your people might be less forward about the sex. But I am here and I am not knowing the culture or language very well. So perhaps it is lonely and a chance for some company would be good, and better if not to get involved with my house that I must live with every day.”

She shrugged, and grinned at me. “Or, perhaps, when you are not having the local language and culture it is harder to be… shy?”

“Coy?”

“That may be a good word.”

Great. Um. Wait a minute, that bit about the princess in a hereditary monarchy thing might have been important. Not to ruin my reputation, but is this worth the risk of a diplomatic incident? Just in case… “Uh. Those herbs you mentioned. You have some?”

“I do.”

“Oh. Well, great!” She raised an eyebrow. “Onward, then?” She got up out of her chair. I took a moment too long to process, then overcompensated by hopping up too quick and knocking my chair over. Dignity, Sylvain, darn it. She was polite enough to pretend not to notice.

We headed back to the dormitory.

#### The Sex

So we had “the sex.”

Not too long afterwards, she got up and started fishing her clothes off the floor.

That was quick. “Heading out?”

“Yes. You are being adequate partner but I am done for now and have classes tomorrow. We will see each other around at the dining hall.”

Adequate? “Babe, we need to teach you some more adjectives.”

Petra smiled at me as she pulled her shirt back on. “I apologize. I am learning many new adjectives, and I think that one was impolite. Thank you for your dinner and your time, Sylvain.” She finished dressing and nodded to me. “Have a good evening.” She left. Perfect! It’s always hard to get chicks to leave afterwards.

I’m sure she’ll be asking for another date soon, but I’ll play it cool. Nothing’s lamer than a needy dude.

#### The Next Day

Well, that went well. I got some, Leonie and Ashe really hit it off, and… Edelgard and Dimitri didn’t work but awkward is just kind of Dimitri’s way. Maybe I need to find some other hobby for him besides brooding or dating.

Two out of three isn’t bad.

#### You Will

**_Elsewhere…_**

_”Did you enjoy your date, my lady?” asked Hubert, dripping with sarcasm as he smiled and made a mock bow._

_Edelgard returned the smile, chill and amused. “Oh, definitely, Hubert. Sylvain suggested we could wed and unify the Kingdom and the Empire.”_

_Hubert chuckled. “It does have the advantage of being a more reliable method of conquest, although I would find it less satisfying.”_

_“I’d do it for the Empire, too.” She smiled, sadly. “Maybe for myself, once upon a time.”_

_“I take it that option is off the table, however?”_

_Edelgard snorted with amusement. “Rhea would never allow it. Besides, from the way Dimitri froze up when Sylvain suggested we could marry, you’d think a spear had just been rammed up his spine. Now he’s thinking about the risk we pose at the time I’d least like him to.” She scowled at the floor. “I just about wanted to kill Sylvain.”_

_“We begin soon, my lady. With luck, you will.”_

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to whaleandjanuary for helping me proofread this and providing feedback.


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